The recent infanticide case concerning a 16-yr old girl who threw her newborn kid down her flat has instigated a widespread outbreak of copycat killer litter cases throughout the island.

Items found below many HDB void decks include more infants, condoms, cigarette butts, lottery tickets, parachute slings, and the occasional flower pot.

Inspector Tiew Lar Chi said that although the CHENG WOO has been explicitly suppressing the media from reporting this case, there was still a dramatic surge in killer litter cases islandwide.

"Many people believe that as long as the item they throw out is not a flower pot, HDB will not confiscate their flat," said Insp Tiew, looking at the pile of debris. "Police have erected thousands of 24-hr spycams throughout the neighbourhood to catch anyone who ejects anything out of their windows."

The 16-yr old girl, who cannot be named to protect her identity, will not be facing the murder charge as psycharists determined her to be in an unstable mental state at the point of committing the offence. However, HDB indicated that the flat will still be confiscated for killer litter.

Residents living on lower floors have expressed concern about the litter. Some have even constructed nets to prevent more deaths from happening. Others have dug into the ground and filled them with water, creating a series of mini-lakes throughout the neighbourhood.

Mr Chee Choo Wang, a retiree who lives on the ground floor, erected a 49sq m net outside his flat to catch more newborns. Mr Chee proudly told SAMedia that his net rescued another three infants before the desperate single mothers migrated to a nearby block without nets to ensure kills.

The SAF is considering paying residents to continue maintaining the nets even after the infanticide spree is over, as they provide excellent camouflage from enemy air reconnaisance. However, the Ministy of Environment yesterday ordered the filling up of all mini-lakes as they are suspected of breeding the aedes mosquito.

The Singapore Casket reported a fifty-fold increase in demand for baby coffins. Casket shares closed a record high of $7.23 at the ST Index today, up $5.40 from $1.83 yesterday. The last time Casket shares gained so much in a day was immediately after the Bali bomb blast.

Several social organisations have stepped forward to provide assistance to these girls. Ms Mayah Binte Limaia, full-time counsellor at the Befrienders of Desperate Single Mothers (BDSM) told SAMedia that young girls who find themselves pregnant and dumped need alot of support, counselling and encouragement.

"Young girls driven into desperation will often do irrational things," said Ms Mayah, herself a single mother. She indicated that with proper guidance, single mothers can still make it big in society. "Just like the Singapore Idol finalist Maia Lee."

However, SamLab Technologies Neurotics (STN) Professor Tao Nao Pai commented that the girls themselves are at fault for the irresponsible behaviour and should be duly shot for committing such heinous crimes. "No one forced them to fuck around," said Prof Tao. "And the fucking loophole in the law regarding abortion still exists."

Meanwhile in Parliament ongoing debates are flaring up. Opposition party leader Mr Chiam Buay Tong renewed his attack on the government's policy of procreation, saying that it encouraged teens to fuck around the place and was the root of the infanticide problem. Sources report that most MPs are divided on the issue implementing compulsory procreation for convicted teenage juveniles.

In other news, the increased demand for monks to "liam keng" and de-santicise the infanticide sites has reportedly led Dong Dong Cheng Ltd to set up a 24hr toll-free hotline (1800-SONGKHA) providing immediate songkha service anywhere in Singapore. Rates range from $888 for a quickie to $13,888 for full service that includes the installation of a 100sq m net.

--extracted from the SamHub Times, SAMedia Publications, dated 021204